he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize