Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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