he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
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