dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Randomize
