At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
and she was petting her beer can
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Randomize
