I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I cut my penus on the lid.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
