oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
