i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
Randomize
