i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
your room smells of hookers.
And success
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
