How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
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