At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
