so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
