my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
