All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
i think i just lost a toe
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
