She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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