just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Randomize
