He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
