somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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