Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Randomize
