jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
