I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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