'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
