Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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