dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
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