I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
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