He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
