Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
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