So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
Randomize
