He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Randomize
