I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
