honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Randomize