I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
