He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize