She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize