You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Randomize