Jerry, you need to find god
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
