I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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