In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
