I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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