His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
