how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Randomize
