Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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