I think I won the penis lottery.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
and you fell through a lawn chair
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
