It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
