Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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