About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
