Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize