saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Where are you guys?
Drunk
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