i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
