ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Randomize
