Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
did you just send me my own nude
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
